Blue Suede Shoes and Soul Searching
I need to get a bit Dr Phil for a moment, minus the baldness and plus the overkill of cliché one liners and sound bites. After last week’s return to the 80s power ballad (namely Alone by Heart on constant repeat) I have been thrown into a week of deep thought and realisation.
I always thought I was the down to earth, true to myself kind of person. Going with my gut instinct and all that jazz (come on its been ages since I threw in a song line just seemed like the right time to throw in a bit of Chicago) but in the start of my year of trying new things, I am slowly discovering how wrong I was.
There is being true to the person I am now and being true to my soul. There is a better version of me inside just waiting to burst out but in the habits of my daily life, I am not true to this part of my soul, the bit waiting to burst out that is. I am lazy with my time. I allow the more than occasional over indulgence on sugar. I don’t follow up on things I know I should and I justify these bad habits all very easily. These actions are lies that I tell and it’s not being true to myself at all. I’m not saying it’s easy it’s a battle between my desire to be true to my soul and my desire to have short lived fulfilment, which let’s be honest it’s got to be way easier to be Chelsea Handler than the Dalai Lama?
What about the other everyday decisions I make? How I present myself, what job I will take, political views, what I will and won’t stand up for, perceptions of situations and daily judgements I place on others. Am I really being honest or is it all just tainted with reflections of past experiences, hurts, embarrassments. I have realised that I have been stuck living in this world for years now. I do also believe everything happens for a reason though but perhaps now it’s time to find a little more truth, a little less conversation a little more action (I bought a pair of fake blue suede flats this week …oh yeah. Reminds me of Elvis everytime I put them on).
Is self-discovery overrated? After all ignorance is bliss right? If I choose not to flow things that I am passionate about, not to top up my soul then, how long could I survive? And if I am being true to myself then should I give into every whim? Sex, drugs, food, love? Where is the balance that will allow me freedom and lightness of being?
Okay, so this is actually getting way to Dr Phil even for me.
I want to know what makes YOU happy and how long can that actually sustain you? Are our guilty pleasures food for the soul or scraps for the ego?